The Best Thing I've Ever Done for Myself

Ever feel like you have so much you want to say and you're not exactly sure where to start? I've got this web of ideas that I want to dive into and it could get kind of tangled, but it's worth a shot, right?

I'm pretty sure the best and most kind thing I've ever done for myself was quitting What I Wore. I debated it for years and there were a few reasons I kept on doing it - I was making great money to support my family while Adam started his own business, I was (and still am) kind of vain and liked looking at photos of myself, and I also liked building friendships from people around the world. Probably in that order if I'm being honest. 

Well after Bea was born I kind of lost my steam. I didn't feel great about the way I looked and my sponsorship offers stopped coming in (read: ground to a fucking halt!)  I wasn't super active on pitching any either. After a while I gave posting outfit photos another try, but with two children to look after, getting "ready" each day and dragging them somewhere to shoot photos (and often feeling really bad about how I looked in them) just made me miserable. Then we decided to sell our house so keeping it clean and ready to show at a moment's notice just meant my plate was overfull. You know what happens next - we move and have a new house to deal with and "deal" is the wrong word because moving here is also in my top five best things I've ever done for myself. This place is magical and I love being here with my partner and kids so much.

Anyway, I wasn't making money, I didn't feel good about my appearance and I just didn't like the direction I was going in (or the direction of the fashion blogging world for that matter). It just felt (and still feels) so freaking salesy! It went from creative and resourceful to one big commercial. I mean, I did it too, so I'm not shaming the players, I'm hating the game. 

So before I wrote that last post (a gift to myself for my 35th birthday), I mentally just let WIW go. I didn't feel dread when it had been two days without a post. I didn't even open my laptop for days at a time. I started to feel really good and I knew it was time put that little blog to bed. I cannot tell you how many mornings I would be frustrated to tears because I'd gotten up early to shower and put together some new outfit and then it didn't photograph well and it felt such a massive waste of time. 

Fast forward to now. This is the part I want to put to words and I'm not sure if I can do it properly. I feel so light! I feel so free! And I feel more beautiful - inside and out - than I have in a very long time. It's so much bigger than downsizing my wardrobe to a sweatshirt and jeans. It's really not about the clothes at all. Someday I might care about that again. But for now, clothes are just things I wear to do other things I love. Sometimes it's a cute dress, sometimes it's my work jeans. I can still feel good even if there's no photo to prove what a good outfit it is/was. #picoritdidnthappen 

So lately I've just been radiating joy. Most days. I still have times when I'm knee deep in another tantrum or sick of changing poop diapers and just OVER IT. But more often than not, I'm frustrated little things. Things I can deal with. Not frustrated with myself, my online "brand" (ugggghhhh), the game or the judgment. 

I don't want this to come across as an anti blogger or anti shopping kind of sentiment. I still like blogs. Well... let me take that back. I like some people I've found online and I've realized I don't have to follow folks who bring out my jealous side (my fault, not hers!) or my insecurities (again - that's all on me!) As for shopping, cue the Macklemore and find me at the thrift shop. I still like collecting things. Now they're 99 cent baskets instead of J.Crew new arrivals, but whatever. The shift has been really good for me. Maybe the best shift of all is just letting myself be ME, like I have in those instastories or in these rambling posts. 

And I think the gratitude I've been feeling for this new mindset is just attracting even more goodness. In a material way, I'm finding things left and right (be they in the garage, attic or at the thrift store).  My marriage has improved so much. And as Oprah would say - I feel more fully present in the deeper world around me. That's why giving up my old job was the best thing I've ever done for myself.

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Have a great weekend, friends! I just saw some daffodils blooming on campus and I can rally around that! Spring is coming! 

Inspired By | Modern Farmhouse Laundry Room

I am so close to completing my laundry/mudroom makeover I can almost taste it! We enter and exit primarily through the back of our home and needed a design update to flow with the rest of our home (which you can see here if you want!).

For those of you who are new around here - we live in a farmhouse built in the 40s with a major addition put on in the mid sixties. In true farmhouse style, rooms have been added on or spaces made larger and I suspect our laundry/mudroom used to be a porch of some sort before it was finished. 

When I started planning for making over this home, my catchall was "Midcentury Modern Farmhouse" (Here's my huge Pinterest board of the same name) And when I say farmhouse, I mean more of the bones of the space and less in the way of decor (probably no chicken wire in my future!) I've also found myself really doing a lot with bohemian style too - lots of wooden vessels, baskets and houseplants. So for this laundry space, I wanted to set the tone for the whole house and pull together everything I love!

These photos are a great example of what I've been inspired by!

1. Shiplap | Thanks to Jo Jo and Fixer Upper, shiplap has become a popular texture and makes perfect sense for a farm style entry room. I can't wait to show you what my dad and I installed! I have become pretty decent at the miter saw and at swinging a hammer too! And I felt like a boss at the lumber yard loading up my pallet and picking the best wood. 

2. Open Wooden Shelves |  In our last home we did open shelving in our kitchen remodel and I loved it. Adam has a technique for making the boards super smooth and for laundry organization it just makes perfect sense to have your cleaning supplies right by the machines. For this house we've been able to upcycle all of our open shelves and that fits in really nicely into my Make, Do & Mend mission. More on that when I show the final space! 

3. Plants! | This is kind of an aside, but I feel that my seasonal depression has been mitigated by how many houseplants I have hanging out with me (now up to over 20 #plantgang!) My laundry space has two huge 70" windows so there's a lot of opportunity for growing! 

4. Bright White | Nothing say so clean and so fresh (Cue Outkast) like bright white walls in a laundry space. I used to feel like white walls screamed RENTAL! but after years of doing so much color I really like them. And white black and wooden accents they just look so pretty. 

So that's kind of a hint to how the space will come together. I am 85% complete right now and just waiting on a delivery to finish up and then photograph (and a nice sunny day!) Guys - I'm pumped! I've found a lot of joy in my home projects and can't wait to share! 

May the Thrifting Odds be Ever in Your Favor

Today was another epic day of thrift shopping for me. I've been hitting up Goodwill a lot lately - even more so since the beginning of the year when I decided to try to only buy second hand or make what I needed (or wanted!) 

I've written about some of my tips in the past here and yes, I usually take both kids with me. It involves a quarter for the gumball machine at the door (we just can't quit those damn gumballs!) and a stroll through the toy aisle in search of a ninety nine cent distraction. I should also note I'm usually not looking for clothes and definitely not trying on when both kids are tagging along.  

I also have a pretty standard routine of what I look for - wooden items, dishes to match my antique china, lamps, cooking tools and what I lovingly call decorative items (vases, mirrors, oil painting, etc). I think I usually have luck is because I go often and I also really happen to like your grandmas 1970s castoffs! If your style doesn't have a boho slash cobbled together vibe, I dunno if it's gonna be your thing. But mine is, so cha ching! Gimme all the octagonal mirrors and wooden candlesticks!!

Anyway, today was my day!!! I found a smattering of baskets I'm using in my new laundry room update, some weird and tacky wall mount candle holders and something almost bought straight from the baking section of the craft store... A donut pan! Just typing it feels a little lame but I shouted with joy (not too loud, I'm only 85% weirdo) when I found it! I'm going to start using my go to paleo banana cupcake recipe and top with honey and peanuts! I'll share soon if it works out!

Back to the thrift store - we also spotted a new version of a vintage toy - this particular item containing more of the pieces our old toy came with (the first one - a playskool cash register, only had one yellow coin - the new one came with 5!). And a Paw Patrol lunch box (see earlier point on distractions).  

if you have any interest in seeing any of these doodads, I have an Instagram story up right now or just stay tuned for my laundry reveal that's coming soon (waiting on one last thing for my floors!)

I also had good clothes thrifting juju last weekend when my friend Indiana was in town. I haven't gone with a friend in years and it was So. Much. Fun! Aside from some random woman who saw me try something on and was like "don't even look!" (No one asked you, lady!) A girl needs a partner in crime once and a while. We also went after a brunch cocktail which made it even better.

Lastly, I think I've just been in sync lately because I just keep finding things I've been looking for around the house and garage. I'm kind of ashamed (only to tell you, I really don't care IRL) that we still have an entire unpacked garage bay full of boxes. If they're still there come garage sale season, they're going going gone (to whomever will venture way out here in the country to buy them). 

Sometimes you just find exactly what you're looking for - may the thrifting odds be ever in your favor!

My New Favorite Breakfast

In the past month or so I've been adding more vegan meals to my daily eating habits. I'm not 100% there and I don't plan on going all the way but it feels good to get so many plants into my kitchen! 

My favorite thing to eat these days is a banana and chia seed coconut pudding. I top it with nuts and berries, honey (technically not vegan) and mint. The mint is what makes it feel like a brunch worthy dish. And it's so pretty! 

To make my pudding I use one can of whole day coconut milk, one banana, and about 1/3 cup of chia seeds. Oh! And a dash of cinnamon! I let it sit overnight in the fridge and it makes about three servings. It's a good plant based far source, especially as a nursing mom!

Speaking of nursing, if you have concerns with your milk supply, go easy on (or skip) the mint. Plants in that family are sometimes used for oversupplies or weaning. 

There are so many goodies you can top this off with or add in - I've used leftover quinoa, any fresh or dried fruit and lots of different kinds of nuts!